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Category Archives: Communication
I often meet parents whose adult children who are suffering from a mental illness such as anxiety, depression or anorexia, or who are suicidal. When I hear these parents talk about how they're dealing with this situation, they often appear very stoic. They say things like “I need to be strong in order to support my son”, or remark that “I've told them that they are very strong”.
At the same time, I often notice my own feelings of emotional disconnection around these same parents during our interactions. They often talk a lot about themselves in great analytical detail but without much real emotional engagement, and rarely ask me about my own life or how I feel.
I sense that they're avoiding something in our conversations: a sense of emotional connection.
Unfortunately these behaviors are exactly the opposite of what a person with a mental illness needs in order to feel the sense of emotional safety, love and support that could potentially heal their brain and help them through a time of deep crisis.
While all parents instinctively love their adult children, mentally ill people need to be surrounded by love and support that they can actually feel.… Continue reading…
It can be tough trying to figure out the right thing to text a woman.
How do you strike that balance of showing interest but not scaring her off?
And is there anything you can do with your wording that will increase the chances of her replying?
Here are some suggestions for flirty texts to send her that may help you elicit a positive response.
Each suggestions is classy, sweet, and thoughtful; basically all the traits most women are looking for in a man:… Continue reading…
Whether you meet a woman in person or online, it’s generally a good idea to start off with an opener that will help a woman let her guard down a bit around you.
Don’t know where to start? Here are some suggestion on complements for women upon your first interaction.… Continue reading…
Many men (and women for that matter) in our society don't deal with their emotions well. As a result, most of us are walking around carrying an ever-increasing accumulation of emotional baggage that can get triggered even in seemingly innocuous situations.
For an example where this happened to me, check out my recent story on Why I Got Upset In Guitar Class. I'll wait here while you do that...
Dealing with people who are upset can be very challenging. Part of what makes this challenging is that other people's emotional upset is likely to trigger our own unresolved emotional baggage. This is why many people try to shut down expressions of unpleasant emotions in other people or resort to "rescuing" behaviors intended to stem the flow of another person's feelings that are making us uncomfortable. Naive rescuers often think they are "helping" because they see the upset person appearing less outwardly distressed; but the upset person is simply internalizing their emotional pain which has disastrous consequences for everyone in the long run.… Continue reading…
Here is yet another confidence building tip for you. And today you’re going to learn about how to overcome some of that approach anxiety that you may have about talking to women who you haven’t met before.
And the key to overcoming this is to break things down into manageable steps, and the step that I want to talk to you about today is simply giving compliments to women that you see without having any kind of expectation of getting anything back from them or any kind of payback or any they’re going to like you or you’re going to end up talking to them or in bed with them. Just dropping all that stuff.
Hey there, it’s Graham here from The Confident Man Project. I want to recommend to you one of the best books that I've ever read in the field of personal development, and it’s called Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton. This is an absolutely fantastic book to read not just once but to read over and over because I find I keep having experiences in my life where I realize, “Oh, that’s what Blanton was rabbiting on about in that book about being honest.”
So the background of this radical honesty thing is that essentially the author outlines three different levels of honesty that we typically exhibit in our lives with other people. The first one is honesty about facts; things like talking about the weather, different ideas, things that are generally accepted to be true.
Hey there, it's Graham again, and today I want to teach you about how to learn the skill of public speaking. Now, before you start shaking in your boots, consider that public speaking is one of the number 1 things that you can do to increase your self-confidence.
One of the things I highly recommend for facing your fears in The Confident Man Program is getting up at an open-mic night and performing in front of a live audience. You'll feel the excitement beforehand and the adrenaline rush when you're up there, and the elation afterwards knowing that you've conquered most people's biggest fear. From then on, it becomes really fun.
Given that I like to walk my talk, here's the video of my recent graduation gig from a stand-up comedy course that I did recently. My biggest fear was losing the plot on-stage and forgetting my material. Everything was going great until about 5 minutes in... when I lost it completely! The results was hilarious. I know you'll enjoy it:
Hey there, it's Graham from The Confident Man Project with an idea for you and here's something I never had the guts to do back before I worked for myself, but that's okay. I can still suggest it. You might want to do it. And that is to be able to go and ask your boss for a raise.
This is particularly important if you feel that you're not being paid your worth and you're a hard-worker. You do a really great job and you just feel as though maybe you deserve a little bit more in your paycheck and you want to push your comfort zone, step outside and do something that's a little bit challenging; then it's a great idea to go and ask your boss for a raise.