Today I want to talk about what you should do on a first date. A lot of guys are stressed out about what to do on a first date and end up setting up some fancy, highfalutin dinner date thing where the woman feels kind of trapped and the guy feels like he’s got to impress, and it’s just stress and tension and it’s just not a whole lot of fun for everybody.

So what you really want to do on a first date is simply take a woman out for coffee. Go to a coffee shop and just sit around and have a chat. Keep it nice and light and casual. Nothing too heavy-duty. Make it easy for her to escape if she needs to escape if she doesn’t like you and don’t get all caught up on the idea that she needs to like you.

The irony is that the more easy it is for her to escape and the more comfortable she feels being able to get up and walk away if she has to, then the more comfortable she’ll feel with you and the more likely it is that she’ll like you, which is why a coffee shop is a much better first date idea than a movie where you’re kind of stuck right there or a dinner date in some fancy restaurant.

Lessen the pressure, man. Just make it easy. An ideal way to start doing this if you are scared shitless about taking women out on dates is to start just going to coffee shops with your female friends. Ring a female friend that you’re not all that sexually attracted to or interested in but somebody that you get on okay with you and just say, “Hey, do you want to go out and grab a coffee?” Go out and grab a coffee.

Go out to your local coffee shop, hang out, just keep it light and playful like you’re having a bit of fun just having a chat with your friend and this will give you some confidence in being able to just go out and meet women and take them out to a coffee date. Practice on your friends and get to know them on a deeper level. Learn a bit more about them, something that you don’t already know.

Even if you don’t find them all that attractive as a romantic prospect, just learn to be able to talk to women about things that are important to them and find out who they are deep down. And any woman will appreciate this if you take the time and effort to actually get to know her on a deeper level, and over time you’ll learn how to do this with women generally and you’ll be able to just be more relaxed with women in general.

So this week find a female friend that you get on okay with, take her out to a coffee shop, just get to know her, spend a bit of quality time and just get a bit of practice in hanging out with women in a first date type scenario.

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Graham Stoney

I struggled for years with low self-esteem, anxiety and a lack of self-confidence before finding a solution that really worked. I created The Confident Man Program to help other men live the life of their dreams. I also offer 1-on-1 coaching via Skype so if you related to this article contact me about coaching.

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