Get Yourself a Male Mentor

About
- About The Project
- Graham’s StoryI suffered from a chronic lack of self-confidence right from early childhood through most of my adult life. I am a sensitive person and was deeply traumatized by the never-ending conflict and hostility in my parent’s relationship. My mother was, and still is, the dominant force in my family of origin. Highly intelligent but emotionally withheld, she was always quick to criticise and would never back down in any of the petty arguments with my father that characterized their relationship. He, on the other hand, was relatively passive yet and was often driven to explode with frustration due to his inability to express his emotions or to handle my mother’s frequent put-downs. She would berate him saying “You stupid creature; why can’t you just tell me what you’re thinking!”, not realizing the irony behind her nagging criticism. Our home didn’t feel like a safe or fun place to be much of the time. My two elder sisters both dealt with this in their own way, leaving me feeling excluded and abandoned a lot of the time. My sensitivity in this situation was always invalidated, caused me a great deal of grief and felt like a genuine weakness. Ironically, my parents…
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Contact Me
- Personal Coaching via Skype
- Guest PostingI welcome contributions from experts with wisdom to offer about how to help men become more confident and effective in their lives. If you’re a psychologist, counsellor, life coach, dating coach or you’re just passionate about any topic which can help men, I’d love to hear from you. You can become a one-off guest blogger, or contribute a series of articles over time. Relevant topics include [intlink id=”57″ type=”category”]self-esteem[/intlink], [intlink id=”25″ type=”category”]communication skills[/intlink], [intlink id=”4″ type=”category”]emotional mastery[/intlink], [intlink id=”99″ type=”category”]masculinity[/intlink], [intlink id=”5″ type=”category”]women[/intlink], [intlink id=”10″ type=”category”]dating[/intlink], [intlink id=”11″ type=”category”]relationships[/intlink], sex and [intlink id=”6″ type=”category”]life skills[/intlink]. Basically anything that helps make a man more confident, competent and effective in the world. This is a great way to broaden your exposure if you have a product, service or business helping men. In return for contributing, you get the kudos of seeing your name in print and a valuable dofollow back link to your website in your Bio, which is good for your search engine ranking. If you have an affiliate program, I will join it and use my affiliate link in your Bio. Either way you get your name in lights as a subject matter expert, along with more traffic, business and/or…
- Getting Your Own Clients
- Affiliate ProgramThe Confident Man Affiliate Program
- Joint VenturesDo You Have A Product For Men That I Can Help You Promote? I like to form mutually beneficial business relationships with other people, and I’m always looking for other great products to promote to my customers to help them become even more confident and successful in life. My customers have a proven buying track record in this niche and my visitors list have all come across the site while searching for dating and attraction products. Using my list is a highly targeted form of promotion. Your product must be original, and high quality. No point just repeating what’s in Double Your Dating. I only promote products which I have actually read and found useful myself, so be prepared to send me a copy. You must have an affiliate program that I can join in order for me to promote your product. The simplest way I’ve found to manage an affiliate program is to use ClickBank as your payment processor; they do all the work for you, and have a neat marketplace where you can advertise your product to get affiliates. I recommend you join ClickBank if you haven’t already done so. If you have a product aimed at men…
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Topics
- ConfidenceConfidence, or more precisely self-confidence, is an awareness that you have the ability to rise to whatever challenge life throws at you. It is the single most important asset that a man can possess, because it determines how you respond to challenges that impact how well everything else in your life goes. Great challenges always involve great opportunities, but it’s only through having confidence in yourself that you are able to see and take advantage of these opportunities. Confidence is partly general and partly contextual. You might feel confident about your ability to drive a car, but not so confident about your ability to play a guitar… especially if you’ve never learned. But an innate sense of self-confidence will make it much easier for you to learn to play a guitar, because you’ll feel more positive about the likelihood of success and less worried about failure. Every skill that you acquire has the potential to build your self-confidence, and this general sense of confidence begins to spill over into other areas of your life. We start out in life by inheriting the confidence of our parents, plus or minus a little depending on our personality and individual disposition. Lack of…
- Assertiveness
- Self Esteem
- CommunicationCommunicate Clearly and Confidently
- RelationshipsHave better relationships
- Masculinity
- MindsetDevelop a confidence mindset
- EmotionsMastering your Emotions
- TherapyDifferent types of therapy for building your confidence
- WomenRelate to women confidently
- DatingGet more and better dates
- SexMaster the art of making love to a woman and giving her incredible pleasure.

In an ideal world, your father taught you everything you need to know in order to grow into a confident, powerful, successful man. In the real world, my father didn’t know half of what I needed in order to be the man I was meant to be. That meant I needed to find other male mentors to fill in the gaps. If you talk to anyone successful at anything, you’ll discover that they didn’t get there on their own: they had help from their teachers and mentors. So I suggest that you specifically seek out men who have achieved what you want to achieve, and learn everything you can from them.

Your relationship with a mentor can take many forms. Mentoring may happen in person, remotely via email, at training courses, or through books, ebooks and websites. It may be a one-off interaction, a short term relationship or a longer term arrangement. Successful people love passing on their wisdom, seeing other people flourish and helping them avoid the obstacles that they got stuck on in their own journey. Some mentors coach others willingly for free as part of the way they give back to the world, and others make a living doing it professionally. Whatever you’re looking for, there are mentors out there waiting for you to make contact with them.

Mentors who want to help as many people as possible often distill their wisdom into a book for mass consumption. This is what I did: I distilled everything I learned about becoming a confident man into The Confident Man Program so that I could help far more people than I could if I was coaching people individually. Consider the connection and the valuable wisdom you can get from a mentor who you may never actually meet, but has valuable insights to share with you in writing.

Other mentors love the human contact and rewards that come from seeing their mentees grow. I have taught and mentored people directly as a life coach, and through the mentoring program my Toastmasters club. I love seeing people overcome their fears and grow in confidence to fulfill their potential.

I wouldn’t have gotten where I am today without supportive mentors, and I will continue to rely on encouragement, support, advice and wisdom from other people as I head where I want to go in the future. No single person has all the knowledge, wisdom or insights that I desire, so I rely on a wide variety of mentors with a diverse range of relationships.

Some of my mentors who I’ve found helpful and would recommend have been:

Women & Dating: David DeAngelo
Street Dating and Day Game: Alex Coulson
Approaching women: Joseph Matthews
Money: Napoleon Hill, Stuart Zadel
Manhood/Masculinity: Steve Biddulph, David Deida
Humor in Public Speaking: Darren LaCroix
Story Telling: Craig Valentine
Subconscious: Steve Sweeney
Free Self-Expression: Billy Milionis, Sanford Meisner
Men’s Psychology: Dr Paul Dobransky
Mindset: Paul Blackburn
Emotional Mastery: Nicholas DeCastella
Blogging: Yaro Starak

If you’re interested in developing your confidence in any of these areas, follow the links above, check out their products and make contact with them to see how they may be able to help you get where you need to be faster than you can on your own.

Build your self-confidence faster with The Confident Man Program

Categories: Masculinity

Tags: mentors

Graham Stoney

I struggled for years with low self-esteem, anxiety and a lack of self-confidence before finding a solution that really worked. I created The Confident Man Program to help other men live the life of their dreams. I also offer 1-on-1 coaching via Skype so if you related to this article contact me about coaching.