My Plan For Next Year: Become A Rock Star

About
- About The Project
- Graham’s StoryI suffered from a chronic lack of self-confidence right from early childhood through most of my adult life. I am a sensitive person and was deeply traumatized by the never-ending conflict and hostility in my parent’s relationship. My mother was, and still is, the dominant force in my family of origin. Highly intelligent but emotionally withheld, she was always quick to criticise and would never back down in any of the petty arguments with my father that characterized their relationship. He, on the other hand, was relatively passive yet and was often driven to explode with frustration due to his inability to express his emotions or to handle my mother’s frequent put-downs. She would berate him saying “You stupid creature; why can’t you just tell me what you’re thinking!”, not realizing the irony behind her nagging criticism. Our home didn’t feel like a safe or fun place to be much of the time. My two elder sisters both dealt with this in their own way, leaving me feeling excluded and abandoned a lot of the time. My sensitivity in this situation was always invalidated, caused me a great deal of grief and felt like a genuine weakness. Ironically, my parents…
- Conditions of UseThis site exists for entertainment purposes. If you find any of the information here useful in your life, that’s great; but you retain full responsibility for any possible consequences of any action you might take resulting from the information on this site. I accept no responsibility for any situations or circumstances arising from the use of this information. While great effort has been made to ensure that the information provided is accurate and useful, it remains my personal opinion and should not be considered authoritative. This site is not a substitute for professional psychological, psychiatric, counselling or other mental health services. You should seek advice from appropriate mental health professionals if you think you may have, or may be developing, any kind of mental illness or emotional problems. Under no circumstances should you stop taking or change any medication that you may currently be taking without first consulting your doctor. Submissions to the site become my property. By posting or making submissions, you agree to allow the information submitted by you to be used in whatever form I choose, including re-posting on this site, or publication elsewhere. I will always remove any identifying information from submissions if I choose to…
- CopyrightAll the information on this site is Copyright © by Graham Stoney, and may not be reproduced in any format including reposting on other web sites, on-line forums, books, or e-books without the express permission of the author, [intlink id=”6″ type=”page”]Graham Stoney[/intlink]. Nor may it be used in derivative works or aggregated with other information for commercial purposes. You may, however, deep-link to any information on this site from other web sites, on-line forums or any other place where the information is relevant and appropriate. You may also print or e-mail content to other people for personal use, provided the content involved is no more than 10% of the total content of the site, credit is given to The Confident Man Project, and a link to ConfidentMan.net is retained on the printed copy, or in the e-mail. Any forum submissions become the property of Graham Stoney, and also may not be reproduced without my permission. Before using this site and any information that it contains, see the Terms and Conditions of use.
- Privacy PolicyWe value your privacy! If you submit your email address or other contact information to this site, it will not be disclosed it to anyone else. Your contact information will not be lent, given or sold to any third party and will only be used exclusively for the purposes of contacting you to provide information relevant to whatever you have subscribed to on the site. I may from time-to-time use your email address to contact you about information or products that I think you may be interested in. In some cases, I may be an affiliate and may earn commission if you choose to purchase products that I suggest. However, I will not distribute your email address or other contact details to anyone else; these contacts and offers will only ever come directly from me. I hate SPAM. You will only hear from me by email if you have given me your email either by subscribing via this site, or by giving it to me in person. I will always include a link in any email that I send you to allow you to unsubscribe if you no longer wish to hear from me. If you have products that you…
Contact Me
- Personal Coaching via Skype
- Guest PostingI welcome contributions from experts with wisdom to offer about how to help men become more confident and effective in their lives. If you’re a psychologist, counsellor, life coach, dating coach or you’re just passionate about any topic which can help men, I’d love to hear from you. You can become a one-off guest blogger, or contribute a series of articles over time. Relevant topics include [intlink id=”57″ type=”category”]self-esteem[/intlink], [intlink id=”25″ type=”category”]communication skills[/intlink], [intlink id=”4″ type=”category”]emotional mastery[/intlink], [intlink id=”99″ type=”category”]masculinity[/intlink], [intlink id=”5″ type=”category”]women[/intlink], [intlink id=”10″ type=”category”]dating[/intlink], [intlink id=”11″ type=”category”]relationships[/intlink], sex and [intlink id=”6″ type=”category”]life skills[/intlink]. Basically anything that helps make a man more confident, competent and effective in the world. This is a great way to broaden your exposure if you have a product, service or business helping men. In return for contributing, you get the kudos of seeing your name in print and a valuable dofollow back link to your website in your Bio, which is good for your search engine ranking. If you have an affiliate program, I will join it and use my affiliate link in your Bio. Either way you get your name in lights as a subject matter expert, along with more traffic, business and/or…
- Getting Your Own Clients
- Affiliate ProgramThe Confident Man Affiliate Program
- Joint VenturesDo You Have A Product For Men That I Can Help You Promote? I like to form mutually beneficial business relationships with other people, and I’m always looking for other great products to promote to my customers to help them become even more confident and successful in life. My customers have a proven buying track record in this niche and my visitors list have all come across the site while searching for dating and attraction products. Using my list is a highly targeted form of promotion. Your product must be original, and high quality. No point just repeating what’s in Double Your Dating. I only promote products which I have actually read and found useful myself, so be prepared to send me a copy. You must have an affiliate program that I can join in order for me to promote your product. The simplest way I’ve found to manage an affiliate program is to use ClickBank as your payment processor; they do all the work for you, and have a neat marketplace where you can advertise your product to get affiliates. I recommend you join ClickBank if you haven’t already done so. If you have a product aimed at men…
- Anything Else
Get The Program
Online Course
Get Coaching
Topics
- ConfidenceConfidence, or more precisely self-confidence, is an awareness that you have the ability to rise to whatever challenge life throws at you. It is the single most important asset that a man can possess, because it determines how you respond to challenges that impact how well everything else in your life goes. Great challenges always involve great opportunities, but it’s only through having confidence in yourself that you are able to see and take advantage of these opportunities. Confidence is partly general and partly contextual. You might feel confident about your ability to drive a car, but not so confident about your ability to play a guitar… especially if you’ve never learned. But an innate sense of self-confidence will make it much easier for you to learn to play a guitar, because you’ll feel more positive about the likelihood of success and less worried about failure. Every skill that you acquire has the potential to build your self-confidence, and this general sense of confidence begins to spill over into other areas of your life. We start out in life by inheriting the confidence of our parents, plus or minus a little depending on our personality and individual disposition. Lack of…
- Assertiveness
- Self Esteem
- CommunicationCommunicate Clearly and Confidently
- RelationshipsHave better relationships
- Masculinity
- MindsetDevelop a confidence mindset
- EmotionsMastering your Emotions
- TherapyDifferent types of therapy for building your confidence
- WomenRelate to women confidently
- DatingGet more and better dates
- SexMaster the art of making love to a woman and giving her incredible pleasure.

One of the activities that I recommend in The Confident Man Program Guide is to learn to play a musical instrument. There are a whole host of benefits to doing this beyond simply being able to play music: You also learn a whole bunch of life success skills in the process such as:

Committing to a challenging task
Taking daily action towards your goal in the form of practice
Dealing with plateaus and setbacks
Overcoming your own resistance to success
Developing both sides of your brain: analytical and emotional
Expressing yourself on a deeper level
Having more fun!

Once you’ve got some basic skills under your belt you can also jam with other musicians and join a band where you’ll also learn:

How to work with other people with different skill sets
How to learn from other people
How to contribute to other people’s development
The balance of give and take
When to lead and when to follow
How to blend in and how to stand out
How to have even more fun with other people!

Whatever personal development benefits playing music might have, the most important thing for me is that it’s fun. And girls love a guy that can play guitar. I get a different reaction from women now that I’m a musician than I did when I was a computer engineer.

, My Plan For Next Year: Become A Rock Star

“Fuck it… be a Rock Star!”

Who would have thought?!?

I now have a bunch of musician friends that I jam with regularly, and even do volunteer work with a charity that provides music and yoga to disadvantaged people.

In fact, I’m so hooked on playing music that I’ve enrolled in a full-time music performance course in 2017.

I took up music late in life, so I although part of me keeps telling myself that I’m too old to become a rock star… the dream keeps drawing me forward. Sometimes you’ve just got to stop listening to that old critical voice in your head that says you can’t do it.

Given that I’m now pursuing a career in music, I won’t have as much time for 1-on-1 coaching and writing on this blog in. But you’ll be hearing from me musically, and for me that’s more exciting now. I would never have guessed that this is where I would be heading when I first started learning to play guitar 7 years ago, but that’s the power of taking action. You never know where it will lead!

What’s your plan for next year?

Build your self-confidence faster with The Confident Man Program

Categories: Life Skills

Tags: guitarmusicrock star

Graham Stoney

I struggled for years with low self-esteem, anxiety and a lack of self-confidence before finding a solution that really worked. I created The Confident Man Program to help other men live the life of their dreams. I also offer 1-on-1 coaching via Skype so if you related to this article contact me about coaching.