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Become a Confident Man
- How to Recover From a Controlling Mother 1,986 views
- How to Recover from a Critical Parent 1,460 views
- Do You Have Mother Issues? 620 views
- How To Cut The Emotional Umbilical Cord With Your Mother 495 views
- The Disastrous Duo: Controlling Mother, Passive Father 419 views
- How to Recover from a Violent or Abusive Childhood 400 views
- How To Be Cool 196 views
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One of the things I highly recommend for facing your fears in The Confident Man Program is getting up at an open-mic night and performing in front of a live audience. You'll feel the excitement beforehand and the adrenaline rush when you're up there, and the elation afterwards knowing that you've conquered most people's biggest fear. From then on, it becomes really fun.
Given that I like to walk my talk, here's the video of my recent graduation gig from a stand-up comedy course that I did recently. My biggest fear was losing the plot on-stage and forgetting my material. Everything was going great until about 5 minutes in... when I lost it completely! The results was hilarious. I know you'll enjoy it:
Hey there, it's Graham again from The Confident Man Project, and I want to teach you this week about how to go out and get yourself decked out in some hot new clothes, not anything like what I'm currently wearing, ironically enough. But that's okay because I'm going to tell you what you need to know here.
So basically the story is that if you are still wearing the sort of clothes that your mother dressed you in when you were a kid, that's probably not the latest fashion of today and it's probably not what you want to be wearing when you hit the town when you're out strutting your stuff, meeting new people and just having a bit of fun.
Hey there, it's Graham from The Confident Man Project with an idea for you and here's something I never had the guts to do back before I worked for myself, but that's okay. I can still suggest it. You might want to do it. And that is to be able to go and ask your boss for a raise.
This is particularly important if you feel that you're not being paid your worth and you're a hard-worker. You do a really great job and you just feel as though maybe you deserve a little bit more in your paycheck and you want to push your comfort zone, step outside and do something that's a little bit challenging; then it's a great idea to go and ask your boss for a raise.
Hey, it's Graham here again from The Confident Man Project, and you're about to learn another fun way of building your self-confidence. And today what I want to talk about is letting other people get out of your way.
Hey there, it's Graham from The Confident Man Project, and I want to talk to you today about the importance of finding some mentors or a mentor. Everybody who is successful in life has people behind the scenes that are teaching them and mentoring them and helping them take the next step from where they currently are towards where it is that they want to go.
You may not know this because often the mentors are hidden. The mentors generally do not advertise themselves, but you can bet your bottom dollar that ever successful person out there has one or people in their lives who are mentoring them specifically to help them to achieve the sort of success in life that they want.
What Is An Empathy Buddy?
An empathy buddy is a great way to receive some non-judgmental emotional support from another person, without having to spend big dollars on therapy. They can be particularly valuable if you:
- Have difficulty identifying or expressing your feelings or needs
- Feel isolated and in need of connection
- Don't trust other men to treat your feelings with respect
- Need ongoing emotional support
An empathy buddy isn't a replacement for a therapist; if you have emotional wounds from the past that are causing you fear or anxiety in your day-to-day life, get a therapist. But if you're looking for another way to expand your emotional vocabulary, reduce your emotional isolation or manage feelings of shame you may have about your emotions, an empathy buddy can be a great way to do it.
The idea is to have a buddy who listens to where you're at without judging you and occasionally reflects back how you're feeling and what your needs are. I suggest talking to your empathy buddy on a regular basis, such as every week or fortnight. Like any relationship, it may take a little while to feel fully comfortable with your empathy buddy, but following the guidelines below will help you build trust and rapport together more quickly.… Continue reading…
Hey there, it's Graham again here from The Confident Man Project, and today I'm coming at you live from my beautiful backyard here. As you can see, my backyard looks out over this beautiful bush land, and it's way too nice a day to be stuck in the office this morning so, yeah, I'm here in my backyard. And today I want to talk about feeling like a fraud, and I have a confession to take and the confession is that sometimes I feel like a fraud.
Now, feeling like a fraud is very common so it's quite possible that you might be able to relate to this. And often I've heard a lot of famous people, movie stars, celebrities, people in the spotlight, often talk about how they feel like a fraud. They feel as though they haven't deserved their fame or they haven't deserved what they've got or they feel as though there's some kind of let's call it incongruity perhaps between what they've got or how they're perceived by other people and how they actually feel inside.
G’day, guys. Today I want to talk about how to cut the emotional umbilical cord with your mother. Now, you may wonder why you want to do this or what I’m talking about. So the emotional umbilical cord is a metaphor to refer to that ability that your mother has to control or dominate you or influence you in ways that you may not like.
Now, the origin of the emotional umbilical cord goes back to when you were an infant, when your ability to comply with what your mother wanted was kind of essential to your survival since you were totally dependent on her to feed and clothe and house you. And at some point during your development, you need to cut this emotional umbilical cord if you want to grow up from being a boy into being a man.
The solution to this whole issue is for the man to man up and start stand up to his mother and saying what's important to him whenever there's some kind of conflict so that he can learn to side with you in the relationship rather than with his controlling mother.
There's really nothing that you can do as a partner in terms of what his mother does, and the solution to the problem is not for the mother to change her behavior. You can't expect other people to change, and we have really no control over other people's behavior.