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Become a Confident Man
Resolving The Money Riddle by Paul Blackburn
Resolving The Money Riddle
Do you have money problems? If so, I recommend you check out Paul Blackburn's book Resolving The Money Riddle which will teach you how to identify and resolve your subconscious blockages to wealth and help you create a positive mindset around money.
Paul originally wanted to call this book How I went from Sweet FA to $10 Million a year in 18 Months, but his wife and business partner Mary felt this was an inappropriate business title and they settled on Resolving The Money Riddle instead. Nevertheless, he still managed to slip his preferred title onto the front cover as the tag line.
The theme of the book is that the most important factor in your financial success, or that of your business, is the grey matter between your ears. As in other areas of life, our mindset is everything. For Paul, running a business isn't about the money; it's a personal development opportunity that will push your boundaries at every turn. In other words, it's about how you develop as a human being.
Resolving The Money Riddle teaches you that to be successful with money in your business and personal life you need to:… Continue reading…
Paul Blackburn from Beyond Success
No man is an island: If you want to grow into a mature confident man, you need good male role models and mentors around you. Ideally you'd come across these mentors naturally in your father, uncles, extended family and community where you grew up. But if the men around you weren't fantastic role models or lacked something that you needed... then you need to look further afield.
Paul Blackburn from Beyond Success
One such mentor for me has been Paul Blackburn, also known as Coach Curly, from Australian personal development company Beyond Success. I first met Paul at a 3-day Think And Grow Rich conference in Sydney, Australia. Plenty of speakers spoke that weekend about all aspects of wealth creation, but Paul's message about connecting with my heart resonated most with me.
The first thing that was obvious about Paul was that he's an extremely entertaining speaker. His stories are funny and engaging, and I could really relate to where he was coming from. He also seemed very real; he didn't seem to be hiding behind the façade that a lot of speakers use to protect themselves on stage. Either he'd honed his craft to the hilt, or the guy really was just being real up there.… Continue reading…
What Do You Do If You Haven't Any Success?
In a recent post I recommended that if you want your confidence to grow more quickly, it's worth developing the habit of sharing your successes with other people. In response I got an email asking:
What do you do if you haven't any success?
OK, great question. It may seem hard to celebrate something that you don't already have. So here's my suggestion on how to handle it:
Allow Yourself To Feel The Pain
We live in a society that systematically denies and suppresses emotional pain. Most of us have been taught to hide how we feel both from ourselves and from other people. Having a lack of success in life is painful for a man. For me, it brings up feelings of sadness, rejection, hopelessness, despair and anger.
These feelings are painful, but allowing ourselves to feel them activates the grieving process which takes us back to a clean slate where we can start creating what we want in life. Skipping this step leaves us building on a foundation of pain, which lays dormant ready to undermine our future progress whenever one of these painful emotions is triggered again.
Since most of us guys have been trained to suppress our pain, this may not come naturally.… Continue reading…
Celebrate Your Successes By Sharing Them With Others
Building confidence can take time and commitment. Each success moves us closer to the goal of being the person we were meant to be, but it can be easy to overlook or forget even major personal breakthroughs when we're in it for the long haul.
Our brains are wired to seek out problems in order to solve them ahead of time. This leaves many of us with a tendency to dwell on the negative rather than appreciating the progress that we're making and the awesome things that are in our life as a result.
One of the best ways to counter this natural tendency towards negative thinking is to celebrate your successes by sharing them with other people. I've noticed in my own life that my conditioning against pride left me reticent to share my successes with other people. I literally felt ashamed of being proud of myself!
The only way to counter shame is to share the feelings behind it with other people. If you're ashamed of your successes, I encourage you to share them with other people so that you can learn to feel good about being successful.… Continue reading…
Are You Frustrated With Your Life?
Hey there,
I want to share a secret that will change your life. But first, a question:
- Do you feel frustrated with your life?
Or to go deeper:
- Are you stuck in a dead-end job?
- Uncertain what you really want to do?
- Do you find yourself feeling angry and not knowing why?
- Do you wonder why the girls you like don't seem to like you?
- Have you given up when it comes to women, dating, sex and relationships?
OK, that's enough... I know these can be painful questions. But I want to let you in on a secret that enlightened people have known for centuries which will help you dissolve your frustration:
Posted in Life Skills
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Do You Have Mother Issues?
A lot of guys I know who struggle with their self-confidence had a controlling or domineering mother. This can be a problem that affects our adult relationships with women even if we only have minimal contact with our mothers now. Your mother's influence over you as a child can continue well into adulthood and even past her death.
If your mother was particularly critical and/or controlling (like mine was), she would have seen your growing independence as a threat to be crushed at all costs. A mother like that is a force to be reckoned with that totally overwhelms a child's sense of self. The only option we have as a child is to learn to submit to this woman's power in order to survive.
But giving up your power like that comes at a massive cost later in life unless you claim it back now that you're a man.
Healthy mothers go through a grieving process when a boy grows into a man and separates from her emotionally and physically. You become released from the emotional ties to her moods, values, beliefs and opinions as you become your own man. This can be painful for her as she loses power over you and is forced to adopt a new relationship style based on adult mutual respect.… Continue reading…
Do You Feel Frustrated With Women?
Hey there,
I have a question for you that could change your life:
- Do you feel frustrated with women?
Or to go deeper:
- Do you wonder why the girls you like don't seem to like you?
- Do you feel hopeless when it comes to finding “the one” for you?
- Do you find yourself feeling angry with women and not knowing why?
- Do you get upset when you encounter rejection after rejection from women?
- Have you given up when it comes to women, dating, sex and relationships?
Ok, that's enough... I know these can be painful questions. So I want to let you in on a secret that enlightened men have known for centuries which will help you dissolve your frustration with women:
Posted in Women
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Are You Afraid Of Missing Out In Life?
Hey dude,
I have some tough questions for you, but I think you're up to the task.
So let's be straight with each other: How's your life going?
How's it really going?
- Are you in a relationship with the girl of your dreams? Married? Engaged? Dating?
- Do you have a kick-ass job that you absolutely love?
- Is the money flowing your way?
- Do you have hobbies that you're passionate about?
- Are you surrounded by supportive friends who are living the lives of their dreams too?
Or is your life more like this:
- Are you still single after all these years?
- Stuck in a dead-end job?
- Surrounded by losers?
- Lacking passion for anything?
I know it may be a painful topic but also ask yourself this:
Are you afraid of missing out on what you really want in your life?
This question is so painful for many guys that they settle for what they think they can get in life, instead of going after what they really want. And the problem with settling is that deep down, you'll know that you deserved better. The people you settle with will sense it too. Either you'll live out the rest of your life in denial and unhappiness, or you'll end up having a mid-life crisis or mental breakdown.… Continue reading…
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Do You Feel Like A Failure With Women?
Hey Dude,
I know this can be a painful question, especially when you're going through a woman-drought, but we need to ask ourselves tough questions sometimes if we want to be successful:
How do you feel around women?
- Do you feel like a failure?
- Not good enough?
- Inadequate?
- Afraid?
Perhaps you've become jaded and given up.
Well I'm here to tell you that there's hope; even for a guy like you.
Because I used to be you: feeling like a failure with women. And then I discovered the secret ingredient a man needs in order to be successful with women.
When Sean Connery was asked what it was that made him so successful around women, he said:
Are You Suffering From Depression?
I want to talk about an issue most men don't talk to other men about.
Most of us are too ashamed to talk about it, let alone seek any help for it.
Yet it affects a staggering number of us guys.
So I'll cut to the chase: I'm talking about depression.
Maybe you've sought help and been diagnosed by a professional, or perhaps you just know deep down that you're unhappy. Something is wrong with your life but you're not sure what. Perhaps you feel hopeless for no good reason, or you just can't get motivated, or the light has simply gone out of your life.
It's a painful place to be.
Psychiatrists will tell you that depression is a “chemical imbalance in the brain”, and they're right.
But that's only half the story. The obvious question to ask is: what causes the chemical imbalance?… Continue reading…
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