interviews

Did You Have A Difficult Relationship With Your Mother?

One of the dominant themes that my clients and other readers of this blog usually have that has undermined their self-confidence is a difficult relationship with their mother. When we have a good relationship with our mother from infancy through adolescence, our nervous system is wired for a sense of safety and we are prepared to take on the world as an adult. However, if we had a difficult relationship with our mother, this can wire our nervous system for anxiety and leave us feeling unsafe long into adulthood. Psychologists call this an attachment disorder, and the implications on the rest of our lives can be devastating.

A controlling mother can leave you feeling unsafe

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By Graham Stoney, ago

Recovering From Childhood Issues, Difficult Mothers, Bullying, and Low Self-Esteem By Healing Your Past

I was recently interviewed by Christopher from The Craft of Charisma podcast about the work that I do with my clients to help them regain their natural confidence. The full interview ran over two hours as we went deep into many of the issues that have impacted our self-confidence in the past, how we worked through them and how we both now help other men too.

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By Graham Stoney, ago

How to Connect With Your Inner Warrior

Regardless of how you currently feel about yourself and your confidence as a man, all of us have an inner warrior with genuine self-esteem, inner strength, a sense of purpose, a mission in life, and the self-confidence necessary to go after what we really want. The question is how to get in touch with your inner warrior? The answer is to go on a heroic journey of initiation, self-discovery and growth towards your authentic self.

Changing the world one man at a timeWe can’t undertake this journey alone, so I recently spoke to Boysen Hodgson from The ManKind Project to find out more about what that organization offers men seeking more confidence, clarity and direction in their lives. Here are some of the lessons from this interview:

To connect with the warrior within, we need to go on a heroic quest of adventure. It’s normal to resist the call to adventure initially due to our fear of being seen for who we really are, but the challenge is necessary to discover the resources within us that we aren’t currently aware of.

We decide during childhood who we need to be in order to be accepted, and then get stuck in that childhood decision as an adult long after it has been useful to us.… Continue reading…

By Graham Stoney, ago

Using Tantra to Develop Your Masculine Confidence

I’ve been interested lately in how Tantra can help me take my own confidence to new levels, and recently interviewed Tantric Practitioner David Anderson from TantricBlossoming.com to discuss how you can use Tantric techniques to boost your sexual confidence and become more confident in relationships with women generally.

Many men are afraid of women and don’t show up as a masculine man around women. We’re often particularly afraid of women’s emotions, and this all stems from being stuck emotionally back with mum. When we were a boy we sought love from our mother, and the fear was that if mum didn’t love us we’d be alone and we’d die, so we did anything we could to get love and attention from her.

We run stories about our mother in our heads that keep us stuck in this pattern which we project onto all the other women in our life. The most powerful way to break out of these stories is to be honest with ourselves and our mothers about how we felt towards her growing up. When we start taking responsibility for our mother issues we start attracting different women into our life.

Women often put men to the test to see what we’re made of and whether they can trust us.… Continue reading…

By Graham Stoney, ago