human awareness institute Archives • The Confident Man Project

About
- About The Project
- Graham’s StoryI suffered from a chronic lack of self-confidence right from early childhood through most of my adult life. I am a sensitive person and was deeply traumatized by the never-ending conflict and hostility in my parent’s relationship. My mother was, and still is, the dominant force in my family of origin. Highly intelligent but emotionally withheld, she was always quick to criticise and would never back down in any of the petty arguments with my father that characterized their relationship. He, on the other hand, was relatively passive yet and was often driven to explode with frustration due to his inability to express his emotions or to handle my mother’s frequent put-downs. She would berate him saying “You stupid creature; why can’t you just tell me what you’re thinking!”, not realizing the irony behind her nagging criticism. Our home didn’t feel like a safe or fun place to be much of the time. My two elder sisters both dealt with this in their own way, leaving me feeling excluded and abandoned a lot of the time. My sensitivity in this situation was always invalidated, caused me a great deal of grief and felt like a genuine weakness. Ironically, my parents…
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- Personal Coaching via Skype
- Guest PostingI welcome contributions from experts with wisdom to offer about how to help men become more confident and effective in their lives. If you’re a psychologist, counsellor, life coach, dating coach or you’re just passionate about any topic which can help men, I’d love to hear from you. You can become a one-off guest blogger, or contribute a series of articles over time. Relevant topics include [intlink id=”57″ type=”category”]self-esteem[/intlink], [intlink id=”25″ type=”category”]communication skills[/intlink], [intlink id=”4″ type=”category”]emotional mastery[/intlink], [intlink id=”99″ type=”category”]masculinity[/intlink], [intlink id=”5″ type=”category”]women[/intlink], [intlink id=”10″ type=”category”]dating[/intlink], [intlink id=”11″ type=”category”]relationships[/intlink], sex and [intlink id=”6″ type=”category”]life skills[/intlink]. Basically anything that helps make a man more confident, competent and effective in the world. This is a great way to broaden your exposure if you have a product, service or business helping men. In return for contributing, you get the kudos of seeing your name in print and a valuable dofollow back link to your website in your Bio, which is good for your search engine ranking. If you have an affiliate program, I will join it and use my affiliate link in your Bio. Either way you get your name in lights as a subject matter expert, along with more traffic, business and/or…
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- Joint VenturesDo You Have A Product For Men That I Can Help You Promote? I like to form mutually beneficial business relationships with other people, and I’m always looking for other great products to promote to my customers to help them become even more confident and successful in life. My customers have a proven buying track record in this niche and my visitors list have all come across the site while searching for dating and attraction products. Using my list is a highly targeted form of promotion. Your product must be original, and high quality. No point just repeating what’s in Double Your Dating. I only promote products which I have actually read and found useful myself, so be prepared to send me a copy. You must have an affiliate program that I can join in order for me to promote your product. The simplest way I’ve found to manage an affiliate program is to use ClickBank as your payment processor; they do all the work for you, and have a neat marketplace where you can advertise your product to get affiliates. I recommend you join ClickBank if you haven’t already done so. If you have a product aimed at men…
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Topics
- ConfidenceConfidence, or more precisely self-confidence, is an awareness that you have the ability to rise to whatever challenge life throws at you. It is the single most important asset that a man can possess, because it determines how you respond to challenges that impact how well everything else in your life goes. Great challenges always involve great opportunities, but it’s only through having confidence in yourself that you are able to see and take advantage of these opportunities. Confidence is partly general and partly contextual. You might feel confident about your ability to drive a car, but not so confident about your ability to play a guitar… especially if you’ve never learned. But an innate sense of self-confidence will make it much easier for you to learn to play a guitar, because you’ll feel more positive about the likelihood of success and less worried about failure. Every skill that you acquire has the potential to build your self-confidence, and this general sense of confidence begins to spill over into other areas of your life. We start out in life by inheriting the confidence of our parents, plus or minus a little depending on our personality and individual disposition. Lack of…
- Assertiveness
- Self Esteem
- CommunicationCommunicate Clearly and Confidently
- RelationshipsHave better relationships
- Masculinity
- MindsetDevelop a confidence mindset
- EmotionsMastering your Emotions
- TherapyDifferent types of therapy for building your confidence
- WomenRelate to women confidently
- DatingGet more and better dates
- SexMaster the art of making love to a woman and giving her incredible pleasure.

Masculinity

How to Develop Your Masculinity

Being a man in today’s world can be a challenge. Fortunately there are a lot of resources out there that can help get us in touch with the masculinity at our core and be more confident and effective in the world.

Between fellow course junkie Dunstan Bertschinger and I, we’ve explored a bunch of books, courses and workshops that have helped us get in touch with our intuition, emotions, and inner magician. Dunstan is a swimming coach who helps his clients gain confidence by developing their relationship with the water. He sees learning to swim as a metaphor for finding your place in the world: you can relax and trust the water to support you, or you can struggle to stay afloat.

Here’s a podcast conversation between the two of us discussing several courses and workshops we’ve found helpful lately for developing confidence and getting in touch with our masculinity. Some of the themes we cover:

The real meaning of confidence
Opening your heart to receiving from others
Being real with women and other people
The problem with being nice when we’re inauthentic
Giving up perfectionism
Transforming emotional wounds into personal power
The power of naming your fears
Your thoughts and feelings are not real
The secrets of personal magic/alchemy
Overcoming creepiness
Reversing our childhood conditioning and being honest
Overturning negative beliefs

It’s real, it’s raw, and you can preview it by clicking the play button:

… Continue reading…

By Graham Stoney, 13 yearsJanuary 25, 2012 ago