I want to talk about an issue most men don't talk to other men about.

Most of us are too ashamed to talk about it, let alone seek any help for it.

Yet it affects a staggering number of us guys.

So I'll cut to the chase: I'm talking about depression.

Maybe you've sought help and been diagnosed by a professional, or perhaps you just know deep down that you're unhappy. Something is wrong with your life but you're not sure what. Perhaps you feel hopeless for no good reason, or you just can't get motivated, or the light has simply gone out of your life.

It's a painful place to be.

Psychiatrists will tell you that depression is a “chemical imbalance in the brain”, and they're right.

But that's only half the story. The obvious question to ask is: what causes the chemical imbalance?

Psychologists argue about nature versus nurture; and they'll probably keep arguing forever.

Here are two simplistic answers:

  1. Not getting your needs met.

  2. Suppressing your emotions.

If you have either or both of these going on for an extended period, it starts to affect your brain chemistry on a physical level. This is your brain's way of alerting you to deal with the underlying problem. That's why it's painful. Like physical pain, mental pain stops you in your tracks in order to get your attention.

Many of us in western society resort to medication nowadays to make pain go away. If that's the route you choose, that's fine. But be aware that there's a catch: anti-depressants will numb you and and reduce your motivation to deal with the issues that are stopping your getting your needs met. They'll also suppress your emotions.

Well isn't that interesting? That's exactly what caused the problem in the first place!

So here's a question for you:

Do you really think you'd be depressed if you were living the life of your dreams?

Probably not!

I have another way of looking at depression that's equally valid to the one your psychiatrist will tell you:

You don't know who you are... yet.

This may sound rather zen when you first hear it, but once you start the journey of discovering your true self, it makes total sense. You're depressed because you're missing something. A key ingredient of self-awareness. And if I was to summarise that ingredient in one word, it would be:


I'm talking deep, inner confidence. When you have it, you know deep down that you have the capacity to get your needs met. You also know how to master your emotions so that they guide you in life, instead of controlling and inhibiting you.

This is not a journey for the faint-hearted. It means taking full responsibility for your life, dealing with some tough issues from the past and learning to live in the present. You probably also have a backlog of unexpressed emotions to release before that chemical imbalance settles down.

If you need medication as a stop-gap measure to get you through, by all means take it. And if you're already on medication, definitely do not stop taking it just because you've read this.

Start taking action instead. The journey ahead may be challenging, but it's also incredibly fulfilling and tremendously rewarding as you really come alive, perhaps for the first time. It can also be great fun.

So where do you start? It would help to have someone to guide you, wouldn't it? Someone who's been there himself.

And that's exactly what The Confident Man Program is: A step-by-step guide for dealing with the toughest issues in life so that you can get in touch with your inner confidence. The 250-page program guide covers everything you need to know about your Mindset, Emotional Mastery, Confidence with Women and Life Skill to put depression behind you and live the life of your dreams. Bonus audio downloads and ebooks fill in any blanks to give you the most comprehensive confidence-building program for men out there.

If you're depressed, you owe it to yourself to do this program. Life rewards the man who takes action. Taking action consistently towards your goals will defeat depression over time. Start taking action today.

Click here to get the Confident Man Program now.

Categories: Mindset

Graham Stoney

Graham Stoney

I struggled for years with low self-esteem, anxiety and a lack of self-confidence before finding a solution that really worked. I created The Confident Man Program to help other men live the life of their dreams. I also offer 1-on-1 coaching via Skype so if you related to this article contact me about coaching.