Visit A Toastmasters Club

Hey there, it's Graham again, and today I want to teach you about how to learn the skill of public speaking. Now, before you start shaking in your boots, consider that public speaking is one of the number 1 things that you can do to increase your self-confidence. (more…)

By Graham Stoney, ago
Life Skills

How to Deal With Setbacks

Time for some truth-telling: things haven't been entirely rosy here at Confident Man Headquarters in the last few months. Life has ups and downs, and I'm certainly not immune to the emotional roller-coaster effect they can cause. They say bad luck comes in threes and I don't know if it's just bad luck, bad karma or whatever, but I do know it hasn't felt all that great lately.

So what's been going on?

Well, firstly I started a new treatment program for Chronic Fatigue and although I'm cautiously optimistic of my health improving, one of the initial side-effects was being hit with a truckload of anxiety which left me feeling despondent, depressed and hopeless.

Around the same time I entered a Theatrical Improvisation (a.k.a. Improv) contest with some new friends of mine; only to withdraw before the contest had even begun because I was feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and stress. Something I loved doing suddenly stopped being fun.

I also quit Toastmasters because I now know enough about public speaking and it doesn't make sense to pursue it any further until my health improves. This meant my social world was shrinking, right at the time I was feeling isolated, ill and anxious already.… Continue reading…

By Graham Stoney, ago

How to Gain Confidence by Public Speaking

Public speaking is often seen as the ultimate in self-confidence. After all, if you can get up in front of an audience and talk from a platform, surely you must have amazing confidence. Well, yes and no. The truth is that public speaking is a skill that anyone can learn. You don't have to have amazing confidence to do it. But like learning any new skill, particularly one that involves overcoming a fear, this will boost your general level of self-confidence; which is why learning public speaking is so appealing.

The key to effective public speaking is to tell stories in which you have some emotional investment. Your emotions are what connect you with your audience. If you can get up on stage an relive an exciting or emotionally engaging story, and tie it to some lesson or point that you learned, people will want to hear what you have to say. The secret is to avoid going into presenter mode where you lecture people, which audiences hate. And the way to avoid lecturing is to tell stories.

Storytelling is fun, entertaining, and helps you overcome your self-consciousness in front of other people. Plus you'll find that if you tell personal stories, other people will relate to what you have to say and you'll get positive reinforcement from them, further adding to your growing confidence.… Continue reading…

By Graham Stoney, ago