Hey there, it's Graham from The Confident Man Project again and coming at you with another tip for building your confidence, this week by looking at what's going on in the voices inside your head. And what I'd like to suggest this week is that life is hard sometimes. Life has ups and downs. It can be great one day and it can kind of suck the next. And often we're at the mercy of this sort of emotional roller-coaster effect where our moods are just swinging all over the place by what happens to us in life.

So underpinning all this, what I want to suggest is it's a great idea to develop an attitude of gratitude. This is not always an easy thing to do, but the times when it is most difficult tend to be the times when it's most useful.

So whatever happens to you in life, look for that silver lining in the cloud or the bright sunshine on a beautiful day or the nice people who are good to you or the boss at work that you appreciate or the colleagues you like. Try and focus on the positive things instead of on the things that sometimes really suck.

Now, we can't avoid the things that really suck sometimes, but I'm not suggesting you do that. All I'm suggesting is that if you look at things and say "How can I be grateful for this situation?", "What is it teaching me?", "What am I getting out of this situation that is of benefit to me regardless of the circumstances?" and make every situation work in your favor because every situation does work in your favor in some kind of way.

As long as your heart's still beating and your still breathing at the end of it, then there's always going have been something there, however small it may be, that is of some kind of benefit to you. And I know this is a tough one sometimes, but just have a look at generally adopting an attitude of gratitude towards life and looking at the things in life that you're grateful for.

Notice how much more positive and happy this makes you feel, and as a result how much more confident about your life you end up feeling. So attitude of gratitude, and get stuck into it.

Graham Stoney

Graham Stoney

I struggled for years with low self-esteem, anxiety and a lack of self-confidence before finding a solution that really worked. I created The Confident Man Program to help other men live the life of their dreams. I also offer 1-on-1 coaching via Skype so if you related to this article contact me about coaching.